The Different Types of Online Daters, Part 1

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Mr. Perfect On Paper But Not In Person

He’s articulate, witty, charming — and you have just about everything in common. In terms of match questions, you answered most of them exactly the same (except for a few irrelevant ones, like if they know the first name of every person they made out with). But since you’re attracted to more than just his personality, let’s be honest. He is smoking. Hot, that is.

Fast forward: You have excellent conversation, agree to meet in person (oh my god, people actually do that!) and hit it off extremely well. You go on a few dates, and things are going well until you either:

a) Tell him that you’re happy at any point.

b) Tell him (while not suggesting total exclusivity) that you’re not particularly interested in seeing anyone else.

c) Try to make plans with him. At all. Ever.

Suddenly, he stops returning your texts and doesn’t answer his phone. Wait, hold on. What happened? Turns out most men, in my recent experience, have some form of commitment issues that they’d (understandably) rather not tell you about right away, which they then end up using as an excuse (not understandably) to run away (literally) and never talk to you again. Cool. Men suck. Continue reading